There is a Reason...

 So I haven't blogged in awhile... mostly for lack of material! It's very easy for me to get in the daily grind and forget to look for the memorable moments. Lately I've been rather blah. Mostly because I get frustrated when life doesn't happen exactly the way I have it planned in my mind. Hmmm... sound familiar? Yes, that would be my ultimate villain in life - myself. I haven't ran all week (yes, coming from the girl who is a month away from the half marathon...) mostly because of self pity or lame excuses. So today I got off my keester and went for a run. We also bought Halloween candy this weekend and one too many "taste tests" left me feeling a little flabby. With my motivation to burn off the candy calories, I set my phone to my "Smellin' Coffee" genius playlist (love itunes for the genius feature by the way). I felt the need to hear some uplifting music. About half way through the run, this song "There is a Reason" by Caedmon's Call started playing. I heart Caedmon's Call. They have always been one of my favorite bands since high school. The lyrics are below and the second half of my run below that!

late at night I wonder why
sometimes I wonder why
sometimes I’m so tired
I don’t even try
seems everything around me fails
but I hold on to the promise
that there is a reason

late at night, the darkness makes it hard to see
the history of the saints who’ve gone in front of me
through famine, plague and disbelief
His hand was still upon them
cause there is a reason
there is a reason

he makes all things good
he makes all things good
there’s a time to live and a time to die
a time for wonder and to wonder why
cause there is a reason
there is a reason

I believe in a God who sent His only son
to walk upon this world and give His life for us
with blood and tears on a long, dark night
we know that He believed
that there is a reason
there is a reason

for the lonely nights
and broken hearts
the widow's mite
in the rich man's hand
and the continent
whose blood becomes a traitor

for the child afraid to close their eyes
the prayers that seem unanswered
there is a reason
there is a reason

 This song was just what I needed to hear. There is a reason, and God does make all things good. There is a reason that my life doesn't happen the way I plan it. I can only see my future through a tiny peephole. God sees my future as fields and open acres. He sees it from beginning to end. I see from minute to minute. Even though it's hard to let go, I am so grateful that life does not go MY way. 

As my feet were pounding the pavement to this song I started thinking - God is in control of my life, I am in control of my decisions. God can chose the course, I can chose how to react. I can be a companion in the passenger's seat, or I can be the worst back seat driver ever. God is in control, I am in control of my decisions. 

One year for Christmas, I got a sweatshirt that said "I Want What I Want When I Want It - Spoiled Brat". It was an inside joke in my family because as the baby I usually got what I wanted all the time! Well, truth is, I don't always get what I want when I want it, and thank God for that!